I got serious about my job. I always liked my job, but… getting a family was my top priority and I pushed my job to the side. This time I pushed the family-oriented side of me very very deep down. It was like I dug a hole, a very deep hole, threw it in there, and covered it up with dirt. A lot of dirt. I was even able to finish my first book before the twins’ toddler birthday. Kiara and Emmett grew up into such cute kids! They are friends now, they play with each other all the time. Sometimes they even chased each other around the house, but we were all happier when they sat down and played dolls. Getting them fed was a whole different story. They were either hungry or tired. I can’t say for sure how many times they just fell asleep in their high chairs.
We were always cleaning up their messes. Always. I had barely any time to go to the bathroom or take a shower! A nice long bath seems like heaven right now, I’m not even kidding. All I want is five minutes alone. I’m so glad I finished my book before their birthday.
Jonathan was finding it harder than Yumiko, this whole parenting thing. I guess he figured he’d have more time to figure it all out, I know they weren’t planning to get pregnant on their wedding night. He was always almost passing out, but he was a good parent. He would always say hi to everyone when he got home from work, if they weren’t sleeping. Sleep was something hard to come by now. Even getting 1 minute to sit down was something!
Mom helped out a lot, she’d already raised two toddlers, though not at the same time. We were always cleaning, toddlers can mess things up that you didn’t think could be!
When I finally had a moment to myself, I changed up my room. I pushed the bed against the wall, a reminder about what happened with the plumhead. If I ever brought another man in this room, I was going to really think about it, I’d have to move the bed. I hung a fancy book on the wall that I’d gotten from my job, did I mention I was officially in a career as a writer? There were plenty of things I wanted to think, maybe even to say, but I didn’t let myself. Whenever I just wanted to smash Kiara and Emmett’s dollhouse, I went upstairs and worked out instead. After all, that dollhouse kept them occupied and us sane! Working out was actually a great way to channel my underlying feelings and keep them that way-hidden. We had enough to deal with without everyone knowing what a scumbag my ex-fiance was. The only thing I was happy about was that I hadn’t married him… all I had to do was toss my ring and say we’re done. I went over the moment like 50 times before I fell asleep every night. What did I do wrong? But I knew it was nothing, that girl even said it… he wanted to woohoo with me and that’s it. That was what he wanted. I couldn’t change that. So why did I feel like there was something wrong with me?
Nobody even thought a thing of me exercising. I’d always been active, since I was a teen! But with everything going on I hadn’t gotten a chance. I hadn’t gone to the gym… since when? I don’t remember going since, since….
I actually hadn’t worked out since I met the plumhead at the gym! I’d been too busy with getting a family with him that I hadn’t worked out since! Oh gosh!