The last few days have been torture. I don’t know what to tell Dani. She noticed that I was acting weird within a few minutes that I got home, but I was able to pass it off feeling off because of my pregnancy – and she bought it. Why wouldn’t she? I’ve given her no reason not to trust me…until now.
“Zoe…” I sighed, trailing off. Was I supposed to have eased into it instead of just blurting it out? Watcher, everyone in her whole house probably heard me! Damn it.
Zoe seemed to have found her words again as she started talking, saving me from saying something else dumb. “You flirted with Lyric’s husband?”
I nodded quietly. I just couldn’t take it anymore and I’d ended up finally driving to Zoe’s for her advice. I couldn’t tell Lyric, because of obvious reasons, and Raini lived all the way in San Myshuno.
“What did you say?”
I groaned, recounting the moment. “I told him…that his eyes were beautiful.”
Zoe looked at me, surprised. I waited for her to say something, but she only started giggling.
“I’m sorry…” she giggled, taking a deep breath. “Sorry. But this is all because you said his eyes were beautiful?”
“Yes,” I replied, raising my eyebrows. Why was she saying it like that? Was I missing something here?
“You didn’t say you wanted a piece of that or anything like th – ”
I gasped, interrupting her. “No!” My Watcher, who did she think I was? There’s no way in hell I would ever be that obvious. I had never even flirted like that to my wife until we were married!
“So basically, you high-school-level flirted with him. Like it could just be taken as a compliment?”
“Well, yeah…but…” It’s still flirting, I finished inside my head. It’s still flirting, no matter how obvious it is! Flirting like that in high school meant we liked someone, why is it any different now?
“My Watcher, Adelaide. You’re such a goody-goody. Your attraction to others doesn’t just go down because you’re married,” she said matter-of-factly, crossing her arms.
“And he’s a man!” I stated, ignoring Zoe’s last comment, “and I’m a lesbian!”
“Do you think anyone is 100% straight or gay? Because trust me, everyone has had thought a guy or girl cute before. Did you want to…you know…with him? Or were you just like damn, those eyes are niiice?”
She rolled her eyes. “Come on. Did you want to do him or not?”
I gasped slightly. I never understood how she was just so nonchalant about talking about sex. It was kind of personal, right? “No. I wasn’t attracted to him like that. It was just a heat of the moment thing – like 5 seconds later I didn’t even know what I saw in him.” And I instantly regretted it. And…
Zoe sighed, cutting my thoughts off. “Then it’s no big deal. If you want to, you can tell Dani – but you don’t have to. It’s not like you told him ‘let’s bang’… or even thought it, trust me, it’s not a big deal. At all.”
I thought about Zoe’s words the whole way home. If she didn’t think it was a big deal, why did I think it was? Sure, she had a different way of living; she’d never married her boyfriend and had dated plenty of guys in high school. But…still. Was it really such an ancient belief to think you shouldn’t flirt with anyone after marriage? She was all modern and somewhat hippie – but that didn’t mean she was wrong. It meant she knew this world – apparently better than I do.
I whipped my head backward at the slight sound of the door opening, exhaling only slightly as Dani walked in. I’d been sitting here for the past hour trying to decide how to go about telling her; there was no way I wouldn’t. I just couldn’t live with her every single day without thinking about this if I didn’t tell her. My body realized I was about to tell her before my brain had decided to, as I started shaking and tears rushed down my cheeks.
“Oh, my Watcher, Adelaide,” Dani exclaimed, wrapping her arm around me worriedly. She started bringing us over to the ottoman, and I took a deep breath as I looked straight into her eyes.
“I…I have to tell you something,” I whispered shakily.
“Adelaide,” she started, grasping my hand, “what happened?”
Everything started spilling out of my mouth, starting with how I’d felt so awkward about my increased.. um… sex drive; and as horrible as it was, I finally managed to find the words to tell her I’d flirted with someone else. I rambled on about how I 100% regretted it and that I only loved her until she grabbed my shoulders and shook me. Weirdly enough, she didn’t seem too concerned about the flirting, and more about how I felt like I couldn’t tell her just how much I’d been wanting to do her.
“I’m so sorry,” I choked out, crying. “I didn’t mean -”
“I love you,” she murmured, squeezing my hand softly.
I opened my eyes wide. “What?” After everything I’d just said, the first thing she said was that she loved me? Why? Was Zoe right? Was it really not as big of a deal as I was making it out to be?
“Look, you forgave me for not telling you I killed someone, for God’s sake. And I don’t know about you, but I think that’s much worse than hormones making you a bit horny…” She smiled softly, resting her heard against mine.
I chuckled, sobbing, as she pulled me closer. She forgave me.
In more ways than one…
There’s nobody else I could imagine living out my life with. Nobody I could imagine raising Valentina and this unborn baby with. She’s the only one I could ever want right there beside me. And I’m so, so glad that everything worked out. I couldn’t imagine it any other way.
A/N: Happy Christmas Eve, everyone! I hope everyone’s holiday season is going great! And I forgot to mention that this was all actually because Adelaide actually flirted with him in-game. At first I wasn’t going to put it in, but as I kept thinking about it, I figured, why not? It really happened, after all! 🙂